Confusion

Bee-chasing incident was the one that made me more aware or concern about my own health. It was then my back will pained on and off. My parents only took it serious after consulting the usual chinese doctor, advising me to have an X-ray of my lower back (waist).

Well, when I first saw the X-ray, it was disgusting. The backbone is not a straight one, in fact, it is some sort like an S-shape. Not only that most of my lumbars and vertebral columns are twisted, facing the side, not at the middle. It is a mild scoliosis since it go off track about 25 degrees, not more than 30 degrees.

Actually, my height has been decreasing since January 2010. But no one took it seriously as we did not think that there was a possibility that something wrong with my backbone since I was a healthy normal human. It was quite amazing that in 5 months time, i have become shorter for 2 cm than my actual height... haih...

The western medicine doctor in the hospital nearby my house, said that it was not that serious and, therefore, I did not need braces nor surgery. However, the bone will not return to its original straight bone. It will either continue to be serious or it will just stay forever like that. So, I should be more aware of my sitting post, go for swimming, do the breathing and stretching 'exercise'....

It seems like there are no chances of recovery. But the chinese medicine doctor, however, still advised me to for tuina twice a week, so that there are still chances to recover rather than doing nothing. The process of tuina was certainly a painful one. It lasted for 2 weeks until my dad brought me to a chiropractic center in Mont' Kiara, recommended by his friend.

The chiropractic center is openned by a Hong Kong chiropractic professor. Since the chiropractic center is kind of popular and good, my dad signed me up for a package of 4 treatments which cost about RM720, done by the 'student' trained by the professor. After completing all the 4 treatment, I will then have to have a treatment done by the professor himself, which cost RM480. The chiropractor, Kenny, from Hong Kong, said that the cause of S-shaped bone may be genes factor or injury of sacrum and coocyx. As for my case, the culprit were the coocyx and sacrum.

The treatment is some sort like tuina and till now I have completed 2 treatments. Because it was the positioning of the coocyx and sacrum too high than they are suppose to be, the chiropractor mainly focus on pressing them downwards, back to their original position. The first one is done on last saturday, quite painful, but I was still able to smile in the end of the one hour treatment. It turned worst at the night as it not only hurt but also 'sour'.

Then, I have my second treatment on thursday. That was really really torturing, I can hardly bared the pain. It was so so so painful until I even wanted to cry. One part of the treatment was that he requested his assistant to press my pelvic bones in the correct positioning while he was twisting my legs like hell. I cannot even smile after the treatment except sighing.

I wonder if the treatmemt were really helpful in the sense that will it recorrect my backbone to a straight one in the end of the day. It is unfortunate that I have this problem, but, at the same time, I feel fortunate that mine is not that serious, no one will notice it by looking at my standing or sitting pose, and, it is far more better than those who have cancer or disabilities and also starving children in the poor countries.

However,with this problem I have some limitations. Because of my S-shaped spine, my parents are not encouraging me to participate in taekwondo. And, because of all those massaging, I have missed many taekwondo classes. And, again because of my S-shaped backbone, I cannot really perform 100% in taekwondo. There will be somehow some worries and reluctance.

My grading due date is in December. Will I manage to go for my 3rd Dan grading?? Or should I say will I continue in training taekwondo?? I guess it is a YES for the latter. Or else I will not know how to spend my Saturdays and Sundays if I am not training anymore. Maybe I can ask for not to do those exercises that we usually do like frog jump, duck walk, etc. Well, it seems like there are a lots of thnigs that I cannot do. It is kind of awkward if I were to just doing nothing while others are panting for their breath and completing their exercises. And, what for, for me to go for lesson but in the end do not do anything?? Or maybe I can do lesser than others? Then I'm not not doing anything. Well, exercises that have something to do with the waist like sit-up, I will certainly not do.

Now that with the problem, I will not be as enjoy as before in taekwondo class. As I mentioned, I will certainly have doubts. Unless, I forget about it when I'm in taekwondo class.

What should I do?

I really wish that my backbone can be straight as before. But can my wish comes true? Since no one is able to assure me of that. And, for my wish to comes true, I may have to stop trainning.

Also, I wish to continue my training just like before. But, this may have some drawback to my health.

So, what should I do? I have opposing thoughts.

What should I do?